Thursday, August 6, 2009 | By: Zachary Bartels

Tactless Tracts Propoganda

So I just came across a classic Zach blast from the past. It's a tract that I authored, designed, produced, reproduced, and distributed while in college. I was a committed guerrilla evangelist, but, having decided that all the Gospel literature available was in some way lacking, I busted out my pen, some paper, and Windows Paintbrush (some things never change), and set about creating my first tract: I Hope You Die.

You'll notice that the imprint is "Tactless Tracts Propaganda." My roommate and I founded said tract-mill, splitting its offices between our dumpy kitchen table and the downtown GR Kinko's, and actually put together a respectable number of unrespectable, highly sarcastic, rather alienating tracts, which we shoved into every crevice in our vicinity.

Looking back at this puppy, I have mixed feelings. I count no fewer than four theological errors and some of the artwork is pretty rough (although, in my defense, we were going for the "I mimeographed this in a heavily fumed apartment by the light of a single flickering bulb" underground newspaper look).

Since I so often critique the poor theology of others in this space, let me encourage you to click here and take a ride through the mind of Pastor Zach, circa 1997. Then on to the comments section and let's hear your thoughts on I Hope You Die.

Be brutal.


7 reader comments:

E. said...

Okay, first of all, you spelled "adultery" wrong on your list of sins. This seems like a rather Arminian tract--I need to take the steps, God doesn't do anything except wait for me to get my crap together. This was definitely produced before you embraced Calvinism. And it's interesting to me that this tract seems largely written for people in the church (or perhaps in a Christian college). Did you have any particular people in mind when you wrote this? :)

ZSB said...

I would say I had rejected Arminianism (note the knocking down of "walk-the-aisle-and-say-the-prayer" soteriology), but had not yet fully come to terms with the Calvinist I was predestined to be.

And when you live in Grand Rapids, just about everyone you try to witness to is, to some degree, churched.

E. said...

Good point. That's one of the nice things about not living there anymore. Lansing/East Lansing is a whole different ball of wax.

Joshua Ottinger said...

Jack Chick is now an amateur, sir. That is my response to that tract.

JB said...

Apparently you had big lips in 1997. And God resembles an Academy Award.

Can you believe I still have one of these?

mike said...

1. This is way too long for a tract! Maybe it's a pamphlet?

2. I couldn't focus on anything else after you misspelled "adultery." Are you sure you're not emergent?! (They're the world's worst spellers).

Ted said...

Come on Mike! Correct spelling is just another way that boundary-guarding neo-reformed stormtroopers keep emergents down. Stop judging and love!

Zach: This is awesome. Do you have a printed copy? I need one for my growing library of evangelical ephemera.